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Kiwi magic was on full display as Winston Reid’s extra-time thriller was enough to get the All-Whites their virgin World Cup point on a tie with favorites Slovakia. When interviewed about the moment, Reid was uncharacteristically emotional for a New Zealander. “I am very, very proud. Can it get any better? I think the nation will be in reasonably good spirits tonight.” The Eastern Europeans now face an uphill battle with their two hardest games yet to play.


The story for the second game on Tuesday was not Didier Drogba’s special cast that was allowed by FIFA, it was the sheer ugliness displayed by the Portuguese…”team.” The frequency that Ronaldo attached himself to the earth was sufficient enough to consider that he must have had his equilibrium thrown off by the noise of the vuvuzelas. In fact, at this point, Ronaldo might be a bit of a vuvuzela himself if you know what I mean (what? I meant full of air and noise). It is now certain that after the World Cup, Luis Figo and Rui Costa are going to confront Ronaldo in a dark alley and beat the inner pansy out of him with a couple of soggy horse mackerels for ruining their legacy. It’ll take them a few hours.

Of course North Korea would lock down and hold back Brazil’s firepower for the better part of ninety minutes. Paraguay needed a late penalty to beat them in a friendly a couple of weeks ago so let’s not be too surprised by this. I have them tying Portugal in my pick ’em and this now looks more likely considering the play of the two squads. Brazil did put together some fancy workings which propagated some “oooooo’s” from the crowd. I hold firm in my stance that they should be considered a home side unless they are playing an African team.

Chile got it’s first World Cup win since placing third in the 1962 World Cup, which they hosted. Honduras needed a result in this one to even consider getting out of the first round. Group H got very interesting due to the fact that 31 out of 36 teams that have won their first game during the past three World Cups have gone on to the second round. As we know, two teams in this group have know won and neither of them is called Spain.

My brother turned our old man’s favorite phrase around when he called the Swiss unit a “brick Swiss house,” but I don’t mind adding the profanity in there because that team played STOUT. Ottmar Hitzfeld exercised a similar game plan, based on breaking up Spain’s dominating midfield possession, that the USA executed to perfection last year in the Confederations Cup. It warrants mentioning that both the Americans and the Swiss relied on a measure of luck to win the game. It also warrants mentioning that there exists a game plan that has been proven effective against the Spanish that, pending a couple break go for the opponents, it will result in victory. While disappointing, it is hardly absolutely fatal. Spain can easily advance with two wins and a Switzerland loss to Chile, which wouldn’t be absurd. The difference is that Spain, like Holland, usually cruises the group stage. For a team that has a history of falling apart in the World Cup knock-out rounds, it not not be a horrible thing for them to be humbled at the commencement of their operation.

Diego Forlán… I mean Uruguay, served to South Africa their own “culo” for inspection on a silver platter. Besides being a full-grown man, Forlán’s father Pablo played for Uruguay in two World Cups. Besides that, he dates the gorgeous Argentine model Zaira Nara. This of course means that Diego’s life has often been charmed due to an outstanding set of genes, or is it jeans? Even though Nara committed treason of the highest order and donned a kit of Argentina’s rival for a recent Umbro advertisement, I’m having trouble finding reason to be offended… what we’re we talking about again?